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AFM over IKK

Today we close another epic chapter of AFM's eventful story. A proper writeup has been long overdue, and I'd like to apologize for not writing quality ones (and in the cases where we couldn't write one because we lost, I apologize for not carrying the team to victory). As I write this, I know that the AFM elders will smile upon my words from wherever their lives have led them. We thank thee for instilling in us an appreciation of comradery, justice, alcohol and (when appropriate) vengeance. Boy, was it appropriate tonight. We will execute great vengeance on them with wrathful rebukes; and they shall know that we are AFM, when we shall lay our vengeance on them was the motto for our O round 2 of tonight. I can't say that we looked forward to this match (despite the fact that we felt we could've used an easy win) because in our experience, most of your members act unreasonably while hiding behind the veil of self-righteousness. It's no secret that we've been losing frequently lately but thats what happens when you are forced to play clans like TDA who should be 2-3 divisions above you. The AFM morale was at an all time low since my arrival. we contemplated pulling the plug on the machine, but we entertained the thought of lasting just a few more matches. I'm glad we did. At the brink of death, this match brought us back, reminded us why we play this game, and reinstated the AFM ideal. The new recruits, icedover-final-ekaoxide also had the opportunity to witness the machine in action, doing what it does best, namely making a minimal effort to play which results in pissing the other clan off beyond comprehension.

Round 1: We pile into the server. IKK refuses to play conventionally and pounds the water, intimidated by the mighty ekaoxide of DryWall (who wouldn't be?). They didn't make very many runs but when they did they managed to spam as much as is humanly possible in an abject attempt to get the flag. Now, it wasn't SO abject as they capped three times. Well, we were caught off guard. Also, iced never built a teleporter and just stood in the flagroom jerking off while his sentry gun did all the work despite my threats to ban him. Since it wasn't our server, I suppose my words fell on deaf ears. Final does his thing and gets his groove on leading the way on D. Well, things weren't working out on D, so (being the brilliant strategist that I am) I reorganized a more efficient D to combat the questionable tactics of the IKK team. This involved D rotation and massive OvO. After trailing for most of the round, our changes put us over the edge as we won the round 4-3.

Round 2: This round was plagued with mm1 abuse on behalf of IKK. We'd like to thank them, and direct them to http://yay.clanafm.com for their many mm1 abuse violations. Anyway, as it turns out they get a few early caps (presumably because iced wouldnt build a damn tele), however, we manage 5 caps while we shutout their O with a little help from our offense every now and then. Anyway, once IKK realized it was a lost cause, they started to mm1 and use weird classes like O pyro. I never really understood that because...they should've realized that it was a lost cause even before they joined the server for round 1. I guess they enjoy being blindly optimistic - well, whatever gets you up in the morning, kids. Anyway, we felt bad for them so we gave them a pity cap. I don't think they appreciated it (as they didn't thank us!) but they still capped it like greedy little monkeys yearning for a fruit that lies outside of their reach. I even gave them a handicap since I played with 200-300 ping for most of the round. However, even then they failed to come through.

Aftermath:

We are immediately banned from their channel without an explanation. I did, however, get this when I asked for logs: -21:42:41- (|IKK|MONKEY-VR-XO) your a cock, always have been im dont talking to you now. Well, i wouldn't really call that talking unless an illiterate monkey hurling feces (incoherent english) from his mouth constitutes speech.

AFM O: blackout, ingen, mastaflex, jyplex, asimo
AFM D: ekaoxide, final, icedover (special little guy!), unfor

I'd just like to thank IKK for such a wonderful match. It is truly the tears of clans like you that fuel the fire of the Machine. We encourage you to cry more and make us even more powerful. God bless the Machine and us all.

-[AFM]Unfor

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